Short: The Secret Diary of Ms. Smith


            Jessica Smith had an ordinary life, save for the fact that last night she acquired a magic diary that allowed her to read her future.
            Reclined in her bed, Jessica watched with confused amazement as words appeared on the face of each blank page she opened to in the book. Each word floated up like balloons that slowly broke the surface of still, clear water.
            “It looks like… my, my handwriting?” Jessica mumbled to herself as she slid her slender fingertips across a fibrous page.
            The cell phone rang.
            “Where were you last night?” questioned Arcadia, Jessica’s long-time friend. Her concerned yet calm voice didn’t fare well to disguise her excitable nature.
            “Cadie, I have the craziest story to tell you!”
                        “What are you talking about? Are you all right? Did something happen?”
            “I’m fine. Slow down and listen.”
                        “Okay…So? Where were you last night? C’mon already!”
            Jessica flopped over on her back and proceeded to relay her last-night’s romp of wild sex with the hot guy who hung out at the coffee shop.
            “But you work there Jess! What are you doing fucking the customers?”
                        “I know… it’s not like I do that, well, ever, but this guy… Dorian…it was like he was in my head. He was irresistible! It was like magic. Beside, you know how much I love Oscar Wilde.”
            “Well, where is he now? Did you guys exchange numbers or anything?” Arcadia pried.
            “Well, no. In fact, he must have left some time before I woke up because he’s gone.” Jessica plainly admitted.
            “What an asshole! Forget about him! I hope you kick him out next time you see him again at work!”
                        “Well, whatever. Actually, he left some stuff here. It’s a journal or something, bu—”
            “Hey, I gotta go. I’m just glad you’re okay, and screw that asshole. Dorian was a jerk in the book , too, y’know. Love’ya girl.” Arcadia interrupted and hung up.
            “Bye.” Jessica said, and tossed her phone aside.
            Jessica’s vibrant hazel eyes concentrated on the strange book. She picked it up again and started to read the divining entry for today.
            Her eyes froze.
            Her lips twitched.
            May 29, 2012
            He’s dead! I don’t get it. I don’t understand. Why did you do it?? The police found him. He hung himself. The news report said, in the fucking apathetic news anchor voice, they said “Police found 27-year-old Dorian Black dead this evening.” They are ruling it a suicide, but will need to wait on the autopsy report. He was hanging in a stairwell, you fucking morons! Why would he do that? What did he want me for? I hate you Dorian. I hate you so much.
She threw the book on the floor.
She would never see him again. She cried.

*          *          *
            Jessica dragged herself into the coffee shop from the searing desert afternoon. Sweat dripped from her forehead, and saturated her underarms and underwire.
            She hated her job.
            She hated Dorian.
            She used to see him there almost every day she came into work for the past year. She actually liked him. Although she didn’t know a lot about the man, enough rapport was established between the two for her to know that he was the type of guy she wanted to see herself with; he liked dark-roast black coffee, he was a year her senior, he was a musician, he spoke fluent French and loved to read. She fantasized about her warm olive skin in contrast to his cool ivory hue. She secretly fantasized about what their children would look like—“milk chocolate babies” as she called them.
            Nearly one month had passed since Dorian committed suicide. Jessica thought about quitting her job, but she hadn’t had much luck in her search for a new one.
            Jessica also hadn’t opened the diary since that day, either. She thought about throwing it out, but nostalgia of Dorian’s green eyes and raven hair would get the best of her. Furthermore, a deep—almost unconscious—curiosity of the book’s fantastical power had a stranglehold on her.
            “Yo!” Jessica’s boss—and the coffee shop owner—said to her with a nonchalant nod while wiping off a steamer spout.
            “Hey Seth, has it been slow today?”
                        “Yeah… Not much going on. It’s been pretty quiet. Sold a number of iced mochas though…” Seth rambled on in his usual fashion. “Oh, hey! If you feel like taking today off, go for it. Tryin’ to keep the labor costs down, y’know?”
            “Seth, are you sure?”
                        “Yeah, just make sure to drink plenty of water, right? I dunno how you ride your bike in 120-degree desert weather. Man…Nuts! I gotta ha—”
            “Thanks Seth, take it easy.” Jessica politely interrupted, turned around and walked out the door.
            “Yeah, sure… you too. Take it easy…” he continued on as Jessica left.
            The hot Phoenix summer sun assaulted Jessica again on her ride home. Energy beamed from the sky and radiated from the asphalt.  Heat waves flowed from car hoods and sidewalks. Jessica grabbed for the water bottle in her bicycle basket and took a drink, then grabbed for her phone in her pocket and called Arcadia.
            “Hey love, what’s up?” Jessica said. Sweat beaded on her forehead.
            “Nothing girl, didn’t you work today?”
                        “Got the day off. Hey, you wanna lets go over to Paper Heart for a cocktail?”
            “Sure. I’ll pick you up. I’ll call you when I’m leaving.”
                        “Cool. See ya.”
            The offensive Phoenix heat made Jessica’s 15 minute bicycle ride feel like a lifetime.
            “I need a car. I need a new job. I’m a college graduate. Why can’t I find a real job?” Jessica complained to herself as she walked in her apartment door.
            The small 2rd Avenue apartment had all the vintage charm it advertised to have had, including a built-it vintage wall clock that didn’t work, a vintage gas stove that usually didn’t work and no dishwasher. But, at $525 a month with a private community pool and atrium, private gated access and the laundry room right by her apartment, it was the only thing she could afford in downtown Phoenix.
            Jessica stared longingly at a copy the Phoenix New Times—the weekly alternative press paper that she has tried to get a job at since she moved to the city—that rested on top of her coffee table.
            “Wonder what’s going on tonight…” Jessica mused.
            She picked it up and opened to the back. She had a habit of starting with the classified section.
            And there it was:

Calling All Phoenix Food Writers
                      Do you love food? Do you love writing about food?
                      Do you love staying on top of the latest buzzes in the
                     Valley’s ever-evolving and revolving food scene?
                     The Phoenix New Times is currently looking to fill
                     a staff food writer position. Experience in writing,
                     reviewing and spotting local food topics, restaurants
                     and trends is vital. Please send your resume, writing
                     samples, cover letter and three story ideas to:
                     foodie@phoenixnewtimes.com
           
            Jessica’s eyes lit up with pure passion. Here was her chance—just what she needed; a real job as a real journalist at a real newspaper. She A-lined to her computer and started browsing her clip file for restaurant reviews and food news stories.
            She dug up her résumé and a dummy cover letter, and waxed romantically of when she was a bright-eyed intern at the Hartford Advocate.
            She waxed romantically of how she graduated in the top 10 percent of her class and freelanced as much as possible—she stayed positive, but couldn’t find a job.  She thought about how she felt she needed a change, so she moved to the desert, started a blog, and did “independent” work, as she called it. Jessica thought about how she still wrote a few freelance gigs here and there, but she was broke and needed a steady paycheck. Jessica thought about how she couldn’t find a steady staff reporter position, but she stayed positive and found jobs to make ends meet. She thought about how nearly four years has passed. She started feeling defeated.
            Jessica sat at her computer and diligently compiled what would be the third “résumé, writing samples, cover letter and story ideas” she submitted to the New Times.
            The phone rang.
            “Hey, it’s me. I’m on my way. I should be there in about 20,” Arcadia said.
            “Okay, see you in a few.”
            Jessica got up from her computer and walked into her bedroom.
            “What to wear, what to wear. I never know what to wear,” Jessica sung to herself.  She flipped through her wardrobe. She tossed through her drawers. She washed her sweat-salted face and put on a bit of make-up. She looked around her bedroom, and the leather-bound corner of a book caught her eye. The diary.
            She walked over and picked it up. She shivered in repulse and tossed the book back into the corner she retrieved it. The thick journal flailed open and its enchanted power captured Jessica’s curiosity.
            “Well, I guess it’d be nice to know if I’m going to get the job or if I’m wasting my time,” Jessica coaxed to herself as she went back to retrieve the seductive book.
            She picked up the diary and softly palpated the hard leather cover. Jessica opened the book and stared at the fiercely seductive pages in the same confused amazement as she did the first time she opened it. She quickly flipped through the pages.
            It was overwhelming.
            The book’s pages seemed to go on forever, with dates ranging from today to 10 years into the future. Detailed accounts her future populated each page.
            October 12, 2014
            Today my piece-of-shit stove burnt down my kitchen and it could have burnt down the whole apartment.   Mary finally got this damn thing “fixed” after all these years of me complaining about it and this is what happens. Yeah, thanks for the great work. Why do I still live here? What a dumb bitch of a landlady. My whole life is… 
            “Whoa! That’s not good at all,” Jessica said aloud. “If I’m still living here in two years… I couldn’t—”
            The phone rang again—Arcadia. She decided to check it out later, perhaps.
*          *          *
            Jessica found out exactly what she needed—she didn’t get the job. But, she started to like the strange book. She decided to keep it a secret—how often does a magic diary that can tell a person’s future end up under a girl’s bed?
            Although fully disappointed about the food writer position, Jessica thought that maybe there could be more to this book—that the book isn’t just a static account of her life.
            She thought that maybe she could take advantage of some of the things she learned—like the oven dilemma. Not that she wanted to still live at her current residence in the future, but if she was going to be there, she didn’t want her kitchen to go up in flames.
            Jessica’s face puckered in mischievous curiosity. She bit her lip and picked up her phone.
            “Hey Mary, it’s Jessica from 105. My oven is not working at all, and I think it needs to be replaced. Can you call me back and figure this out? I’m pretty concerned because I think I’ve been smelling gas,” That should take care of that Jessica mused to herself in satisfaction.
            She checked back in the diary to see if anything changed—she even bookmarked the page.    
            It’s not there anymore.
            “Oh shit.”
            Did I just do what I think I did?
            I just changed my future.
            “It worked…I can’t believe it was that…easy?” Jessica pondered to herself. Her eyes widen as she inhaled deeply and let out a sigh of equal parts relief and disbelief. A faint smile pulled at her lips, and her bottom jaw fell ever so slightly.
            “Fortune favors the bold,” she softly spoke to herself. Her countenance drew on a sharp look of determination and purpose. A cold, almost sinister, focus eerily weighted her soft brow line.
            “I’m going to get that job.”
            Jessica studied the diary. For a week, Jessica plotted and manipulated to make her future entries reflect her current desire.
            She thought about Dorian. She considered what Dorian could have been thinking about while he had the diary—before he killed himself. She considered what Dorian could have done in order to manipulate her into his arms.
            …He knew what he was doing.
            The left corner of her lip curled in anger.
            Her focus snapped and she realized she was sitting in a silent and dark apartment, save a dim lamp in her bedroom. She realized she hadn’t left her apartment in days, save going to work and occasional trips to the grocery store.
            “2:34 in the morning?” Jessica nodded her head in defeat to her circadian rhythm.
*          *          *
            “Hello Jessica Smith, this is Janine De L’Ange from Phoenix New Times, and I would like to meet with you this week about the food writer position. I’m interested to put a face to your work, and we can go from there. Call me at 602-212-1448.  Thanks.”
            Jessica’s eyes lit up with excitement.
            …they finally called. They finally called me! They finally called me for an interview!
            She picked up the phone and dialed from memory.
            “Mom? They called! The New Times finally called me! They want to interview me!” Jessica gushed. They talked for a moment, and her mother imparted standard motherly advice.
            “Okay mom, I will. I love you. Bye.”
                        “Love you, too, dear. Buh-bye.”
            Jessica called Arcadia, but she didn’t answer. She decided to send her a text later. She was about to call Ms. De L’Ange, but paused.
            ...check the diary first.
            She grabbed a hair band and put her thick spiral-curled tresses in a high ponytail, grabbed her diary from under her bed, walked into her small yet eclectically stylish living room and sat in an oversized vintage purple armchair she bought at a yard sale. Accustomed to the book’s peculiarities, Jessica efficiently and quickly leafed through the text.
            “I still didn’t get the job,” she said to herself. “God damnit!”
            She violently threw the book against a walk and a guttural, snarling groan bellowed from her mouth.
            “I want this job! It…it has to be mine.”
            She crawled over to the book again, and hunched over it like as though it were a small, helpless bird. She delicately picked it up and looked it over to make sure she didn’t damage it. She went back to her armchair and carefully combed each page for clues—who would get her job instead? She browsed the book for a couple hours. Her breath shallowed as she concentrated her efforts to find a name, if she could.
            “Damn, I need to call back that woman.”
            Jessica put the book down and retrieved her phone from her bedroom. She grabbed a notepad and a pen, and walked toward her small dining table. She put on some coffee and tried to relax. She realized she has five hours before her shift starts. Jessica drew in a deep inhale through her nose and slowly breathed out of her mouth. She wiped her face and briefly massaged her eyes. ­­­
            “I need to call Ms. De L’Ange.”
*          *          *
            It was abnormally busy at the coffee shop for a Tuesday. Jessica worked cheerfully and positively—she was excited about her interview on Thursday afternoon at the New Times.
            “You’re in a good mood, huh? Maybe I should schedule you in the evening more often? Hah!” Seth rambled as he walked out of the back office.
            “Oh, yeah, good idea!” Jessica returned with a smile. She was excited to be at work for other reasons. She was looking for a woman. Viviane Moore. She has seen the auburn-haired woman at the coffee shop before, and recalled talking to her briefly about the fact that they were both journalism majors while in college. She vaguely recalled that Viviane was new in town and was looking for a job as well. Viviane Moore.
            Jessica’s preoccupation was slightly apparent, but nothing too out of the ordinary. Seth recognized the cheerful disguise Jessica wore when she tried to hide something, but he didn’t want to pry.
            After a long evening of preparing lattes, iced mochas, iced yerba mates and black coffees, 10 o’clock finally arrived and Jessica was ready to head home. Tips were good, but she didn’t see Viviane that night. Jessica was heading over to lock up when a last-minute patron waived her down to wait. Jessica was about to give a frown, a shoulder shrug and point to the turned-off neon “OPEN” sign, but she saw the patron’s auburn hair and changed her mind.
            “Thank you so much. I didn’t know where else to go for a hot mate!”
                        “Hey, not a problem at all! Come in!”
            “Thanks again. Appears that you’re closing up? I won’t be long, just a medium yerba mate. There’s agave nectar?”
                        “Yeah, right over on that table. Hey, you’ve been in here before? You—you’re a…writer, right?
            “Why yes, good memory. As a matter of fact, I have an interview on Thursday at 9 a.m. at the local New Times paper. They’re looking for a food writer, so I feel confident this will be my opportunity. I freelance for the Arizona Republic, but I truly aspire to…” the auburn hair woman went on. Jessica tuned her out as she prepared the mate.
            “Sorry, I’m talking about myself so much. I’m Viv. Viviane, really, but call me Viv. And you?”
                        “Oh, I’m Jessica. Yeah, cool. I’m a writer, too. Yeah, I saw an ad for that position. I pu—”
            “Oh great, a writer! That’s really great. I relocated to the Phoenix area—well, Glendale—about six months ago. It’s beautiful here—all of the palms and Saguaros. I’m from Mobile, Alabama. It’s by the gulf...” Vivian went on. Jessica entertained her monologue and quickly labeled the woman a narcissist.
            “Yeah, totally,” Jessica casually replied. “Well, I put a little extra mate in there, so it’s a little stronger. I think it’s better like that. You’ll see. So… you’re new in town?”
            Vivian answered with another monologue. Jessica slowly burned as she imagined that this narcissistic twit could get the job—her job.
            “Yeah, sure. Well, hey perhaps you’d like to hang out sometimes—you seem like an interesting person, and we seem to have things in common,” Jessica commented.
            “Oh, sure, I would very much like that. I’ll give you my number.”
                        “Great. I’ll text you my number as soon as I get out of here. Perhaps we can go out for cocktails tomorrow? I’ll introduce you to my friend Arcadia.”
            “Oh, lovely. Arcadia? What a lovely name. Well, don’t be a stranger. Thanks again for the mate.”
                        “Oh of course. Gotta have your yerba, right? G’night, Viv.”
            …gotcha, Viviane Moore.
            A sly smile lifted Jessica’s lips.
*          *          *
            Jessica considered how she’d get Viviane Moore out of the picture. She decided the best way to handle Viviane was to make her miss her interview.
…cause an accident?
…drug her drinks?
…sabotage her car?
            Her plan was dark and out of context with her typically positive demeanor. She didn’t want to hurt Viviane, so she decided that if she drugged Vivian somehow and caused her pass out at Cadie’s would suffice. Jessica decided that if she were to, say, keep Viviane out until last call and drug Viviane’s first and  last drinks she should be adequately and deeply sedated enough to provide plenty of time for her to miss her 9 o’clock interview. Viviane agreed to go out to the Paper Heart Gallery, and Jessica was certain there was a new exhibit and a band playing, which would give better reason not to leave the venue too early.
            “Yes. This can work,” Jessica mumbled to herself. A pensive look weighed down on her face. A knot of guilt rose up into her throat. She swallowed heavily.
*          *          *
            “Where’s Viviane?”
                        “I thought she said she was going to the bathroom.”
            “Wasn’t that a while ago? It’s almost 2:00.”
                        “I don’t know. I mean, shit, she’s wasted…I don’t know about her—she only had something like two drinks?! Where’d you meet this girl Jess?”
            “I know she’s wasted, that’s why we need to find her. She couldn’t have gone anywhere; we all drove here together. I’ll check the bathroom. I hope she’s not passed out. God.”
            Jessica went on search of Viviane. She pushed open each of the three stalls to make sure. She poked in the men’s room and dashed in the one stall to check. She soberly walked out of the men’s room and looked down. A thick bulb caught up in Jessica’s throat. She tried to swallow it down, but it hurt.
            ….where’s Viviane?
            “Did you find her?” Arcadia asked. Her tall, bodacious hourglass figure, deep brown eyes, onyx skin and cropped African hair always made Jessica—being 4’11” with a petite boyish body—feel like something of a sidekick.
            “No, I don’t know where she is. This is not good. This is not good.”
                        “Girl, don’t you have her phone number? Call her. She’s a big girl. If she went home with someone—good for her. At least someone’s getting it tonight.”
            “Arcadia. We—I have to find her. Can you get off your dick boat for a minute and Goddamn help me? This is NOT good!”
                        “Shit Jess, what the hell’s up with you? Don’t get at me because you lost her. What do you care so much for anyways? You met her like a day ago. She doesn’t know you. You guys barely talked all night. What’s gotten over you?”
            “No! I’m…I’m just worried about her. That’s all. I’m sorry, I just—I’m just worried. She looked really messed up. I just hate the idea of someone taking advantage of her.”
            …and you’re not taking advantage of her?
                        “Look, this place is closing down. It’s 2:08. She’s not in the gallery or at the bar, and she wasn’t watching the band—she’s not here. She left, Jess. Just call her and leave a message. Call her in the morning and make sure she’s up. Didn’t she say she has an interview or something? Don’t you have an interview tomorrow, too? Let’s just go. I’m tired.”
            Arcadia drove Jessica home. After a short yet awkward apology, Jessica got out of the car and walked up to the exterior gate of her apartment building. She slid her key into the heavy lock, turned it and pushed the door open. She turned and waved at Arcadia, who waited to make sure she got in safe. Arcadia honked and drove off.
            Jessica let the heavy iron gate slam shut behind her. She walked to her apartment and let herself in. She hung her purse on the green coat stand by her door. She kicked her heels of and cracked her tired toes. Jessica turned on an Eiffel town-fashioned lamp on an end table and dropped her keys. She caught a glimpse of herself in a white wicker-framed mirror that hung beside the coat stand. She stared herself down; her hazel eyes were dull and shamed.
            …check the diary
            “Fuck the diary.”
            …you want to know, don’t you?
            Jessica shuffled into her bedroom and pulled the book from under her bed. She quickly scanned the section she needed. She closed her eyes and sighed. At least the night wasn’t in vein.
*          *          *
            Jessica called Viviane after her scheduled 9 a.m. interview, but she didn’t answer.
            “Hey Viv, it’s Jess. What happened to you last night? Well, I hope you were okay for your interview. I’d hate the idea that we kept you out too late. Call me so I know you’re okay.”
            A small knot tied in Jessica’s stomach. She didn’t want to hurt Viviane, but she couldn’t help but to feel that something wasn’t right. Still, the New Times job had to be hers, Jessica resolved, and she was able to get it with the power of her diary.
            “I didn’t hurt anyone. She’s fine,” Jessica reassured herself as she went on to prepare for her interview. She reminded herself of a quote she read somewhere.
            “Fortune favors the bold, and I have to be bold and assert myself if I’m ever going to get what I want,” Jessica dialogued with herself as she disrobed and turned the knob in the shower.    “Just put her out of your mind. She’s fine. It’s time for me to make it for myself.” Jessica reminded herself as the too-hot water hit her back like cauterizing needles. She breathed in the steamy air and felt positive; she would get the job and Viviane would not.
*          *          *
            Jessica left her interview feeling confident. She walked out of the New Times office and looked around. She thought about how she would walk into the Jefferson Street building again, but as the new staff food writer. She never felt so strong; she knew she would be hired—her secret diary told her so. She walked over to her bicycle, unlocked it and headed off toward the bus stop.
            When she got home, Jessica went straight to her bedroom, kicked off her shoes, flopped on her bed and grabbed her enchanted diary from underneath the mattress. She browsed the state of her newly formed future; she verified that she still got the job. She looked further into her fate and read that she’d move out of her apartment when her lease expires, and she’d rent a “cozy little” two-bedroom house. She read that her older brother would marry the girl he started dating earlier in the year, and they would move to her hometown in Germany; she’d miss her brother. She read that Arcadia would eventually move to San Francisco with the marketing company she currently works for, meet a firm woman and come out with her homosexuality.
            “I always knew Cadie was a femme dyke,” Jessica said with a chuckle.
            …what about Viviane?
            She checked her phone.
            …still nothing.
            Jessica felt a little concerned, so she flipped through the diary to see if there is any mention of Viviane in her future. She stopped at the next day from the current date.
She froze.
            “No. Please no.”
            Her hands trembled.
            Her throat constricted around a bulge that started to rise from her gut.
            July 13, 2012
            Viviane’s dead. The police found her on Baseline Rd. tied up in a dumpster behind a Whataburger. She was      raped and killed. The third victim in the past month found in the same area on Baseline Dr. They think    they’re all related rape-murders. I didn’t want to hurt her, but these things happen, I suppose. At least I got        the job…
            Jessica ran to the bathroom and puked a burning, frothy, yellowish substance into the sink. An uncontrollable and steady stream of tears ran from her hot, bloodshot eyes.
            this wasn’t supposed to happen like this. I didn’t want her to die.
            “I ju—I just wanted the job. Why is this happening? Dorian killed himself and now Viviane’s dead. Who else is going to die around me? Viviane died for nothing! Just—just nothing!” Jessica cried in angst. A sharp pain stabbed at her heart and stomach. She let up more thick bile. Jessica looked at herself in the vanity mirror. She didn’t recognize the contorted face. Her eyes were red and her eyelids were swollen. Clear, runny mucous flowed from her nostrils. In a haste of anger, Jessica smashed the mirror with her small, bony left fist. The glass imploded and a few thick shards fell into the sink and onto the floor; one lodged itself firmly into the fleshy side of her pinky finger. Deep red blood quickly pooled around the thick shard and started running down her hand. With her fist still tightly clenched, Jessica turned her palm toward her. She could see her tarnished face in the jagged shard of mirror that protruded from her tender flesh.
            “Dorian! Why did you kill yourself? I hate you! Why did you do this to me?! Why did you leave me this book?! What horrible things did you do because of this fucking book?!” She yelped in pain at the sight of her blood, as it ran down her hand and dripped from the boney point of her wrist.
            …this is was you wanted. You killed her. Live with your consequence.
            Jessica pulled the glass out from the side of her hand and spewed an agonized scream. She grabbed a washcloth from her linen closet and compressed the fresh laceration. The smell of her open, bloody flesh filled her small bathroom with a disorienting miasma. In a reactionary haze, Jessica swiftly turned her ire to the diary. She tore into her bedroom and yanked the book. The enchanted sight of the words forming on the pages sparked a viral hatred inside of her.
            She roared at the book. Her eyes sparked alive with vitriol.
            …destroy it, before it hurts anyone else.
            She tore at the book’s interior, and ripped pages from its hard leather binding. The book’s mysterious power further revealed itself as she attacked it.
            “Wh—Wh—What’s going on?”
            She gazed on in incomprehension. The pages she tore out vanished and the blood smears disappeared; the magic diary appeared untouched.
            She dropped the book on the floor.
            In a confused reaction, she grabbed a lighter and set it to the corner of the book. By nothing other than magic, the flame died each time Jessica brought it close to the book.
            “I don’t want this anymore! I—I don’t want this book! Please! Please!” She yelled out as she curled over and began to cry in pitiful shame and defeat.
            She wrapped an old tee shirt around the open wound on her left hand and crawled into her bed. Her body was depleted and limp; her mind was broken and fatigued. She fell into a heavy slumber.
*          *          *
            “Can you come over?”
                        “Girl, what’s wrong? Are you all right? Did something happen?”
            “Please, can you come over? I need to show you something. Something happened.”
                        “I’lll be there soon, okay? Just, give me about an hour.”
            “Okay, I’ll be here.”
            Jessica’s hand was swollen and painful. Blood soaked though the tee shirt and onto her bed sheets. The blood around the wound coagulated and formed a scab that mildly grafted the material of the shirt to the gash.
            “I think I’m gonna need to go to the hospital,” Jessica murmured to herself.
            Jessica hoisted herself out of bed and looked at the book on the floor.
            …you have to get rid of it
            “How? What am I to do? I feel like I’m cursed”
            Jessica walked to her kitchen and tenderly pulled the tee shirt free from the scabbing wound. With her good hand, she prepared a sea salt bath and soaked the wound in the solution. The salty brine sent a stunning zap through Jessica’s hand that made her muscles tense and slightly spasm.
She stood there, with her hand soaking in the solution, and watched as her blood defused into the water and stained it a sanguineous hue. After a few minutes, she compressed the wound with a couple sheets of paper towel.
            Jessica sat down in her purple armchair, careful not to get blood all over it, too. She closed her eyes and imagined how she will tell Arcadia about her secret diary. She imagined how she’d dispose of the wretched book. She thought about Dorian. She thought about how Dorian must of felt trapped with the cursed book. She thought about why he killed himself.
            “I wonder how long he had it. It’s a curse, that book—a real curse. Why did he leave it with me.”
            Her phone rang.
            “Cadie?”
                        “Yeah, I’m by the side gate. Can you let me in?”
            “Yeah, uh, I’ll be out in a second.”
            Jessica walked out of her apartment and headed toward the side gate closest to her door. She could see the confused look on Arcadia’s face as she came closer.
            “Girl, what the hell happened? Please tell me what’s going on?”
                        “Let’s get inside.”
            The two women headed back into Jessica’s apartment. She led Arcadia to her bedroom and picked up the book.
            “This book—Dorian left it with me the night we had sex before he went home and killed himself. This book—it’s magic and it’s evil and I’ve been using it.”
                        “What? What are you talking about? What happened to your hand? Your room? What’s going on Jess? This doesn’t add up,” Arcadia said as she gasped at the chaotic condition of Jessica’s dwelling.
            At the advice of her conscious, Jessica opened the book and directed its pages toward Arcadia.
            “Look! Do you believe me now? I’m cursed! Viviane is dead because of me! This book caused me to end up getting Viviane raped and killed and thrown in a dumpster! They’re gonna find her dead fucking body in a couple days! I bet we could find her right now…” Jessica said and started to cry.
            Arcadia looked on at the book in amazement. She looked on as words floated onto the pages.
            “Wow…where’d you—where’d you get this book?” Arcadia said as she walked closer toward it. She was deeply captivated by the book’s allure. Jessica quickly closed the diary and tucked it behind her.
            “No, don’t! Arcadia, I have to talk to you about what happened.”
*          *          *
            “Jessica. How could you do that? How could you be so selfish? A woman died because of…she died.” Arcadia said with an air of remorse and disappointment. She looked at Jessica for an answer.
            “I have to get rid of it—for good,” Jessica said. She picked up the book and wrapped it in the bloodied tee shirt. “Will you help me? We need to go far away from here. Far away from anywhere someone can find it.”
            “We need to go to the hospital. Your hand is… it’s filleted,” Arcadia retorted. Her wide, almond-shaped eyes revealed the anxiety under her seemingly calm exterior.
            “Cadie, I have to get rid of this book,” Jessica resounded. She burned with the urgency of the moment.
            Arcadia acceded to Jessica’s pleading.
            Jessica proceeded to wipe the periphery of her wound with hydrogen peroxide, slathered a gauze pad with topical ointment and applied it to the gash. Arcadia wrapped it with an ace bandage. Jessica grabbed the book and put it in a canvas tote.
            The two women got in Arcadia’s car.
            “Were do you want to go?” Arcadia quietly asked.
            “I dunno. Away.”
            Arcadia decided that they’d head south on interstate 10, somewhere between Phoenix and the Tucson. As they drove through downtown Phoenix, Jessica thought of something vast.
            “Maybe we can find her,” Jessica mumbled.
            “What? Find who?
                        “Viviane… maybe we can find Viviane? Maybe she’s not dead yet? I know where she is, Cadie, I do! Oh God, we have to find her! We can save her!”
            Arcadia pulled over in a local Safeway parking lot.
            “Hold on, Jess, hold on. What do you mean you know where she is?”
                        “The book! It told me! They’re gonna find her in a dumpster behind a Whataburger on Baseline! Please, Cadie, help me find her!”
            “Hold on, calm down. There’s probably more than one Whataburger on Baseline. And Baseline runs from one side of the valley to the other—that like 50 miles. How do you know she’s not already dead?”
                        “Please Cadie! Please! I can’t let her die! You’re right, I don’t know she’s not already dead, but what if she’s not? What if we can save her? I just have to do it, please!” Jessica pleaded.
            “Damn girl…you’re lucky I don’t have anything else going on. So much for an ordinary day.”
*          *          *

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